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The Aquabats!
Here come The Aquabats! The first all-crime fighting all-surfing rock supergroup in history! Traveling the highways and by-ways of the land in their trusty super customized Winnebego tour vehicle, The Battletram!, The Aquabats look to become a legitimate rock n' roll sensation while doing good for all mankind. Meanwhile, as the powers of evil seek to upset the balance of happiness in the world, The Aquabats find themselves on a never-ending quest to right wrongs, destroy boredom and seek justice for all! Especially the kids! Origin The original Aquabat members hail from the South Pacific island of Aquabania, in the Octagon. An idylic paradise, where people surf all day and celebrate with food all night. Churro baking contests, calypso camp and log races occupied their time, until one day. . . One day while the Bat Commander was contemplating his future (or lack thereof), he looked at the ground and found a flyer for a party at the Melony Hill where 'Space Monster M' was performing. "Cool" he said. "I like Rock and Roll music, it's quite dope." Little did he know that this so-called band 'Space Monster M' wasn't really a band at all, but a space monster from outer space! Hellbent on enslaving the people of the world, this vile enemy would stop at nothing. Space Monster M's intention was to conquer the small island of Aquabania first because of its semi-unknown location and mysterious reputation. He knew that the natives were weak because they wasted their lives on music, TV, Internet, and other worthless forms of entertainment. The Young Commander was shocked to find that his homeland was in danger, so in mock terror, he started to scream at the top of his lungs, kindling the annoyance of many of the surrounding people and causing his boss to let him go. Now the Commander was really free to gather troops together to battle this menace. So, in the hollowed-out log from their log racing team, he led a handful of valiant warriors across the ocean to find help. A strange and evil force descended on the island and life would never be the same. Pushed to the brink of disaster, 8 (or sometimes 9) men escaped impending doom. 'In a hollowed out log these 8 (or 9) men made their way to the highest waterfall and dropped into the raging sea.' Arrival in California Drifting aimlessly for days, the '''eight (almost nine) men washed up on a sandy beach somewhere in southern Orange County, California. Heat, moisture and extreme pressure mutated these men into the most dazzling human-sized punishers the of evil-doers the world had never known. Professor Monty Corndog is the one who found The Aquabats on the beach, half-alive after their treacherous journey to the US from Aquabania. '''Pulling' them from their wooded' mossy log tomb, and having pity on them he took 'took them in to his lab in Costa Colada, CA, nursed them back to health and used them as guinea pigs for new experiments. Later, they explained their story and looked up into his bespectacled eyes for pity. Learning of their peril, he decided to help them fight their cause by giving them the only gift he was capable of, the power of insanity. Through the use of the Professor's scientifically altered convenience store foods, these 8 (or 9) men gained powers well beyond that of ordinary Aquabanians. They became the "AquaBuds". . . then the "AquaBoys". . . then finally, just "Mel and Friends". But later the truth was revealed to them! - - THEY WERE THE "AQUABATS"! With their new found abilities they set out on a rigorous course of training. Everyday the Professor would give them their morning corn dog and they set out to the water for surf and energy enhancing sun activities. Later in the day a nourishing churro would give them the power they needed to withstand even a quick brick to the forehead. In the evening they played music (which the Professor secretly combined with his own Hypno-mind-controlling wave patterns). This would help them gain the unwilling loyalty of those who would dare to listen! By gaining such a following the Professor knew they could gain power over the evil forces that led them so far from home. Armed with radioactive rash guards and anti-negativity helmets these 8 (or 9) Aquabats had set out to "CONQUER THE WORLD"!!! The Return Not satisfied with simply taking a bite out of crime, these men decided to eat the whole apple and take on that juggernaut of injustice – The Music Industry. Using the time-tested "Trojan Horse" tactic, these true geniuses armed themselves with guns and guitars and started a rock n’ roll band. They called themselves THE AQUABATS! Ok, well, it seemed like a good idea at the time… In the midst of a musical explosion that erupted out of the same Southern Californian suburban wasteland that spawned such high-powered acts as the The No Doubts, The Offsprings, The Sublimes, The Sugar Rays and many more. A group of 8 (or 9) Superdudes formed their own Rock'n'Roll assault team and unleashed the name of The Aquabats! Quickly gaining fame across the Southland for their heroic costumes, super-charged music and action-packed live show, these men began building a loyal fan base. So loyal in fact, many even left home to join the Aquabats in secret underground caverns, refining crude oil in preparation for the great and final land war on this American continent. Within minutes, songs were written! Then, a few weeks later they played at some…parties! Some said, "Cool." Others said "What the @#$%?!?" But one thing was for sure – They were on their way to the top. And when they got there, they were going to kick some butts. The Aquabats pounded out rhythms at mind-blistering speeds, as they tore through songs! Surf guitar leads cascaded over "chainsaw-like" guitar riffs while new wave synthesizers dueled with fiesta horn lines that could even make Herb Alpert cry. Meanwhile, The frontman also known as The M.C. Bat Commander, would win crowd over by crooning over the chaos, then backflipping into action when vile villains would try and stop the show. Less like a live performance, and more like a circus bomb, they ripped through sets! They smashed their equipment! They threw stuff! Wild audiences everywhere threw stuff back! The plan was working. Realizing the potential of this potent musical formula, The Aquabats knew they needed to record their sound and drop it on wax like science. So they did just that. 1995 saw the debut album "The Return of The Aquabats." Self-financed, self-produced, and self-released, this 10-track opus broke the proverbial piñata of promise wide open! They caught the eye of many big name record labels, but they knew that in order to lock horns with Corporate America, they had to start at the bottom. So they signed with local concert promoting machine, Goldenvoice to be the first band on their new experimental recording company. The Fury (When we last left our team of super heroes and lovers...) In order to liberate the Aquabats Homeland (The lost continent of Aquabania) from the evil clutches of the great and abominable Space Monster 'M', the Professor had launched the Aquabats on a full global assault to take over the world through music. '''A's our saga continues, we find that things have not fared so well for our friends. They took day jobs and toured the suburbs in an ice cream truck selling Aqua-Pops and lemon pica in order to just to survive, let alone dominate the world. Then, tragedy strikes! Space Monster 'M' placed a bounty on the heads of the Aquabats calling forth villains from all corners of the universe, evil foes such as: Gas Face, The Powdered Milk Man, The Zorilla, El Demonico, The Silver Skull, The Specter, Grungor, The Sandfleas, and even Grandma Peterson along with a countless swarm of others to make things a little worse for our struggling heroes. Space Monster 'M' dispatched this army of the universe's most crummy bad guys to seek out and destroy the Aquabats. As a result of these onslaughts injury strikes, and the Aquabats are forced to recruit old friend and mercenary, The Baron Von Tito, to replace Rod on drums. Then suddenly a vicious Cupid attacks Ben the Brain with sleepless vengeance as he finds himself married and later a father to a family much too adorable for musical crime fighting adventures, leaving the Aquabats brainless. To top it off keyboardist and pancake maker, Nacho, takes a break to pursue his solo career in "Nine Inch Nachos" (Huge in Europe). So the Professor and Catboy scramble to rebuild this legion and invent a multi-talented android known as Jaime the Robot out of the-dessert-you'll-always-have-room-for and video game parts. Then, miraculously, the mysterious Ultra Kyu returned from the swamps of the nowherelands to reconstitute the Aqua-Battalion. Along side their allies, the Magic Chicken, the Wrestling Roadies, the Pigbat and Manboy, the Aquabats were once again prepared to do battle. Still the threat continues, not only is Aquabania in distress, but we find that America and possibly the entire planet is faced with potential calamity from this intergalactic tyrant. Outnumbered and distraught, are the Aquabats done for? What opposition lies ahead? Did I leave the iron on? Stay awake kids as this story unravels. Just remember what counts - It's not the size of the battle...It's the FURY. The world was not prepared for what happened next. In late 1997, "The Fury of The Aquabats" attacked the record shops and radio airwaves, with such reckless abandon, no one could keep up. Not even The Aquabats. With the smash hit single, "Super Rad" in heavy rotation onlocal world-famous radio station, WKRP, they knew they needed to take the show on the road. So, they looked to fellow superheroes, the wonder women of booking agents at Leave Home Booking, and soon found themselves in musical showdowns, across the country, opening for bands such as Primus, NOFX, David Bowie, Rancid, Sugar Ray, Green Day, Sublime, The Foo Fighters, Blink-182, Run DMC, and many more. It’s not even funny, homeboy! Over time, a fiercely loyal fanbase only known as the aquacadets hurled The Aquabats into a headlining spots on their own tours! Nations would crumble, buildings would shake, for the Aquabats and their new legion of homeys could now stand together as one army, united in their ultimate goal of breaking down the walls of injustice, and bringing joy to children everywhere. But just as there must be opposition in all things, The Aquabats must constantly fight against those who would seek their demise. Fiends and foes, villains and vagrants far and wide constantly hurl obstacles and roadblocks at our heroes and their homeys, the kids! Now, with a few more years and a few more albums under their belts, this pebble in the shoe of all that is "cool" is ready for the final onslaught. Who will win? Who will survive? Will The Aquabats be able to overcome the fierce opposition? Will the enemy stand victorious upon the corpses of freaks and geeks the world over? Well, wipe that smug grin off your face, punk. You ‘re about to learn a new meaning of the word fear. THE AQUABATS! The Floating Eye of Death! ... and then, their 90 days of air play were up. In 1998, the Aquabats, were forced go underground for a crime they did not commit. After being discredited by the same Industry that simultaneously embraced them, the Aquabats knew music was their business, but apparently didn't know the music business. Stripped of their good names and their code names, and their stripper names, betrayed by their so called 'pals' in the so called 'rock world', forsaken by fellow team members, mauled by lions, run over by a motorcycle gang, the Aquabats became a complete laughing stock to a world so insensitive, that they would laugh at a band being mauled by a lion. You jerk. Which leads us to...1999. After selling hundreds of thousands of records, thousands of fan club memberships, tens of thousands of t-shirts on the road, ones of hundreds of patches, baby shampoos, fake tattoos and monkey wallets, everyone made enough money to buy their own homes and range rovers ... except for The Aquabats. Now completely broke, with nothing to show for their amazing success, the Aquabats broke up, and broke out. And then it happened. Mysteriously, out of the center of the earth, came a hideous flying eyeball, reeking of havoc and destruction, on a killing spree that would surely total over six billion casualties if it wasn't stopped. The world knew that the only ones that could put an end to this ocular terror, was The Aquabats. Isn't it ironic? Heeding the call, our heroes gathered their remaining troops, and with the aid of legendary producer Thom Wilson (T.S.O.L., Dead Kennedys, New Edition), recorded the soundtrack to this heroic battle at the end of this century. This genius collaboration of music and land to air missiles, submerged the Aquabats to a new level. Who will save the world? The same ones you're laughing at. Now, nobody's gonna breaka their stride, no body's gonna slow them down. No no. They've got to keep on movin...' CURRENT BAND MEMBERS * The MC Bat Commander - Hypnotic Finger Ray, Kung Fu Grip. Fearless leader of The Aquabats, lead singer and all around swell guy has a penchant for saying the right thing at the right time to get the band motivated to action. Being the leader of a crack team of action commandos with a not-so-secret desire to be a popular rock band is not such an easy feat, but the Bat Commander seems to take it all in stride. Even with his own flawed bravado, he still cares deeply about his team and their goal to be seriously the best band in the world. *Crash McLarsen - Punk Rock Super Fist - the most punk rock bass playing super hero known to man, began his quest to fight evil and be in a rock and roll band at an early age. Now a little older, Crash is the muscle behind the band and the man most likely to break something wether you want him to or not. Crash has a special power to grow large which although may be a great asset to the band in battle, has not yet really been mastered by Crash and can happen at awkward times. It seems to work the best when Crash is emotional about something and gets upset which can happen at awkward times. *Jimmy the Robot - James Randall The Robot Part I, Jaime (Hi-Mee) the Robot, Jimmy the Robot, Robot Cakes, or JTR for short was born on May 3rd 1996 In order to create a more perfect android, The Aquabats presented a plan: to make a more perfect robot. And so they did. Jimmy the Robot is the world’s first battle robot and keyboard-playing back-up singer. *Eaglebones Falconhawk - Guitar playing axe man with a knack for power chords, Eagle Bones can shred with the best of them. His guitar can not only blow you away with it’s rocking power licks but comes equipped with a sonic electro beam converter that can transform his guitar into a lazer blasting shred stick! *Ricky Fitness - born a homeless sheltered child in the slums of the Eastern Los Angeles desert, Ricky had to fight his way out of the mean streets to come out on top. Once involved with crime and gangs in his early youth, Ricky has since shunned evil and started a new life through exercise, eating right and playing the drums. FORMER BAND MEMBERS *Prince Adam - Shining Trumpet, Electronic Synthesis, Poetry Attack, Teleportation, Virtual Reality, ESP *Catboy - Agility of a feline, Cat Spray, Ultra Logic, Poison Immunity, Flying discus, Trumpet and a Catapult *Chainsaw, Prince of Karate - exploding guitar, kung fu, karate chop, razor sharp aim, numb chucks and Defender of the Mighty Battle Axe *Doctor Rock - drums, cymbals, physics, personality *Baron Von Tito - percussion, Tractor Beam Stare, Mach 10 Dexterity *Roddy B. "The Hammer" - looks that Main, arms that Kill, Fists of Fury * The Brain - Hyper Hypnotic Guitar Lines, Kind to Children *Nacho - Organ, Master of the Nacho Cheese Ray Gun *Ultra Kyu "The Mysterious Kyu" - secret weapons, levitation, escapism, sultan of suspense *Gumby ALLIES *Professor Monty Corndog *Pigbat *The Dude *The Magic Chicken *Benji the Mutant Boy *Chucklehead *The Moon Monkeys *The Long Beach Dub All-Stars *The Wrestling Roadies *Pilgrim Boy *The Sea Ghost *Danger Woman *Digital Unicorn '''BAD GUYS' *'Space Monster M' *'The Floating Eye of Death' *'The Sandfleas' *'The Lab Rabbit' *'Pumpkin Face' *'Mant (Manant) ' *'Cosmic Gisler' *'Android Dolphin' *'Clowny Clown Vlown' *'Space Mummy' *'Mooncheese' *'White Buffalo' *'Cat with Two Heads' *'Cyclopsis' *'Gasface' *'Dr. Eva Mudlark' *'Werecrip' *'Insaina' *'AntiBats!' *'Cobra Man' *'Carl ' *'Grungeor' *'Cyclopfenstein' *'Silver Skull' *'Powdered Milk Man!' *'Kitty Litter ' *'Sandwitch' *'Tortilla Man' Category:Groups Category:Good Guys Category:Awesomes Category:Bad Asses Category:Allies Category:Outsourced Awesomes